


Horrendous Histories

by orphan_account



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Gay!Oliver, Male Homosexuality, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-04
Updated: 2013-07-04
Packaged: 2017-12-17 15:08:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/868936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Okay,” Angelina chuckled, “This is how Horrendous Histories works...It’s a card game, so basically the egg chooses who’s turn it is,” she held up a small silver egg, “And if it’s your go then you get a purple card, and it’ll question you on an element of your history… and you have to be honest and answer- and then the card gives a dare. It's anything from a cheeky kiss to a full on strip."</p><p>Oliver chuckled, before offering his hand to Angelina, “I’m in,” he raised an eyebrow competitively.</p><p>---------------------------------</p><p>After stumbling upon a very weird card games with the girls, Oliver finds himself divulging all his naughty secrets to very interested ears.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Horrendous Histories

**Author's Note:**

> Just for convenience I've made one or two alterations to the years everyone is in:
> 
> SEVENTH YEAR: Oliver Wood, Angelina Johnson
> 
> SIXTH YEAR: Weasley Twins
> 
> FIFTH YEAR: Hermione, Katie Bell, Cho Chang, Lavender Brown, Cedric Diggory
> 
> FOURTH YEAR: Ginny Weasley

Every bone in Oliver’s body ached like death as he made his way up the labyrinth of staircases to the common room. It was Lee Jordan’s birthday party at the Hog’s Head, which Oliver usually would’ve been able to handle if he’d not had three hours of gruelling endurance training beforehand. The try-outs for university level Quidditch were in two weeks and he was training every spare minute. 

He sluggishly tracked up the steps; his red button-down feeling sticky with sweat against his skin.

When he’d finally arrived outside the common room, he could hear wild laughter and commotion from inside.  
“Ah, girls’ night in,” he smiled knowingly to the Fat Lady, before murmuring the password.  
“Indeed, good luck getting past them!” she sighed, swinging open.

“Ollie!” Ginny squealed, as the girls caught sight of him entering the common room, “You’re back early!”  
“Yeah, er, bit tired I suppose,” he murmured, taking in the sight before him. The girls generally had these sleepover-type-parties when the lads went out- and the boys prophesised in quite significant depth over what the girls got up to (sometimes a little too explicitly, much to Oliver’s disgust) but none of them really knew. From what Oliver could see before him, the six girls: Hermione, Ginny, Angelina, Katie, Cho and Lavender were piled around an enchanted blue ring, maybe a foot in diameter, in the centre of which sat a stack of glowing purple playing cards.

“Oliver needs to join in!” Angelina grinned,  
“YES! Ollie, you have to!” Katie agreed.  
“Oliver wouldn’t be any good at it!” Hermione piped up.

“Why don’t we let Oliver decide for himself,” Oliver sighed, kicking his shoes off and stepping over to the girls. They were all sat with a sleeping bag each, and a collection of fluffy pillows and blankets surrounded them, creating quite a snug, sleep-over like atmosphere. Ginny had a bowl of bright pink popcorn which smelt of strawberries and cream, whilst Hermione and Cho were sipping at light blue bottles of what smelt like a minty variety of butterbeer. As tired as Oliver was, everything was kind of enticing him to join in this sleepover.

“Alright,” he huffed, “How does this all work?”  
“Angie can explain, it’s her game,” Ginny grinned.  
“Okay,” Angelina chuckled, “We’ve never had a boy play this game so we’ll see how it goes. It’s basically a card game, it’s called Horrendous Histories… so this egg chooses who’s turn it is,” she held up a small silver egg, “And if it’s your go then you get a purple card, and it’ll question you on an element of your history… and you have to be honest and answer.”  
Oliver chuckled, “Okay, and then?”  
“And then,” Angelina continued, “If the card is satisfied with your answer, it turns pink and gives everyone else the dare- so if they’ve done the same thing in their past, they have to do the dare.”

Oliver took it all in; before offering his hand to Angelina, “I’m in,” he raised an eyebrow competitively.  
She firmly took it, before offering Oliver a small red vial. “Veritaserum- this game’s all about honesty.”  
Oliver downed it in one, before shuddering at the strange taste.

“Okay, I went last so I get to tap the egg,” Cho smiled sweetly. She placed the small silver orb before her before giving it a tap with the tip of her wand. The egg instantly came to life, rolling like a velodrome around the enchanted ring. It stopped in front of Hermione. The girls oohed and ahhed, as Oliver simply leant back and watched.  
“Okay, Horrendous Histories, Hear my Horrors,” she chanted, and as she did- a purple card levitated from the deck and once in mid-air, folded in half like a beak and began to talk.  
 _“This Horrendous History is a two star rating”_ the airy voice filled the room. The other girls sighed in disappointment. “It’s rated one to five stars,” Katie, who was sitting next to him, explained, “The higher you get, the naughtier the questions.”

The card kept speaking, _“State the name and location of your first kiss, and describe it,” ___  
Hermione chuckled and the other girls just rolled their eyes, clearly hoping for something a bit saucier.  
“It was in second year with Dean Thomas…” she started, “He was a dork but he was really clever and I was bushy haired and desperate… it was really dumb- just after a Quidditch game he asked if I’d kissed anyone and then he just kissed me right there. Probably would’ve hung onto him if I knew how hot he’d turn out!”

__Oliver was now sharing Ginny’s pink popcorn, watching as the card- with a puff and a spark- turned a shade of hot pink, and then spoke again, _“This is a two star dare. If anyone else has kissed the same person as you, you as the player can dare them to kiss another player in the circle,”_  
“Oh, this is where it gets fun,” Lavender giggled._ _

___“Alright!” Hermione smiled, “Who else has snogged Dean?”_  
Angelina raised her hand- and just as Hermione was about to dare her to kiss someone, Angelina shot a glance at Oliver, “Oi! Total honesty, Wood,”  
The girls giggled as Wood reluctantly raised his hand, “It was, like, two weeks ago… we… he was really drunk…” Oliver tried to defend himself, but the girls were having none of it.  
“Okay Oliver,” Hermione grinned, “Since you nearly cheated, you’re getting dared. Hmm, okay…” she mused, glancing around the circle, “You need to kiss Ginny.”  
“With pleasure,” Oliver shot the Weasley sitting next to him a crooked smile, before leaning closer and taking her bottom lip between his, kissing her gently, and then pulling away.  
“God- you’re a good kisser,” she gasped.  
“So I’ve been told,” the keeper quipped back, with a grin. 

__“Okay! Let’s see who’s next…” Hermione smiled, tapping the egg with her wand.  
This time it chose Angelina. It was a three star Horrific History and she had to describe where she most liked being touched. After she made it known that it was, in fact, her breast- the card dared a member of the opposite sex to touch her there. Of course it had to be Oliver._ _

__As the onlookers chuckled, Oliver awkwardly leant forward and brushed a hand over her right boob, sort of stroking it.  
“Um, well that’s a first for me,” he laughed, eliciting knowing laughs from the other players._ _

___After Angelina tapped the egg, it span and landed in front of Oliver. The keeper grinned, “Alright let’s see…” before the card zoomed into the air, and began its speech, _“This is a five star Horrific History”.__  
The room went silent. “Oh my god,” Lavender said first, “We’ve never had one before…”  
“Really?” Oliver asked, but before he could finish Cho hissed a “Shh!” as the card began to speak. 

___“Describe every sexual encounter you have ever had, who it was with, and the reason why.”_ _ _

__The girls broke into a frenzy of screams and laughs, as Oliver flushed pink, leaning back with a sigh, “Well ladies, it’s story time,” he grinned, getting another round of laughs from them._ _

__“Right okay… first sexual encounter… well that wasn’t losing my virginity exactly. It was- and I apologise Ginny” he added, nodding to the girl next to him, “A mutual wank with Fred and George after practice in my third year,”_ _

__The girls broke out in mixed responses: Hermione and Cho flushing pink, Lavendar, Katie and Angelina in fits of laughter and Ginny cringing, muttering, “They were twelve” to herself in disgust._ _

__“Any by mutual wank… well we sort of ended up wanking each other… it was all kind of a haze… Moving on!” Oliver exclaimed, “Okay… so that was third year. Fourth year was um, blowjobs with Cormac . Basically all year in the locker rooms…” he cringed, “God- those walls have seen things,” he chuckled._ _

__“Cormac McLaggen?” Katie Bell gaped, “He’s gay?”_ _

___“As a palm tree,” Oliver sighed, tossing a few popcorns into his mouth. He continued. “Right before the end of fourth year Percy and I had a snog, but nothing more”_  
“Argh! He was so innocent before that summer…” Ginny gaped  
“Oh come on! Percy was bi-curious and sharing a dorm with the queerest thing since Bertie Bott,” Oliver gestured at himself, “I don’t think you can really blame him. Moving ON!” 

__“How long does this go on for?” Cho asked incredulously.  
“Well we’re getting to the good stuff now,” the keeper winked, “Er, so in November of my fifth year Cormac’s “summer boyfriend” broke up with him via owl, so he comes crying to me when I’m getting my pyjamas on. I comfort him without kissing him because we didn’t do that… but naturally we end up on my bed- and he’s still sobbing because his little Henry realised he wasn’t actually that into guys, which lead to Cor having a crisis about his manliness and how he’ll never be good enough for anyone, so I say, ‘Cor, love, you’re always good enough for me,’ and then he says that he felt he was cheating on me even though we weren’t actually in a relationship… just, um, blowing… one another… and so I tell Cor that he’ll always be special to me… and then we just sort of had sex. I mean, we were both fifteen…and it was amazing.”_ _

__None of the girls spoke._ _

__Even the purple card in the air had its jaw dropped. It quickly composed itself, although the girls took longer. “That’s… amazing,” Katie spoke first._ _

__“Yeah, you know, he’ll always be pretty special to me… but then it was later in our fifth year and we were both sixteen and we were like- we’re both reasonably hot, young gay guys. We don’t need to tie ourselves down!’ and so we didn’t. Um, so we’re on fifth year- right, so Fred and George heard about the whole losing my virginity thing which lead them back into wanting to restart our, er, little sessions… even though they were like, fourteen. But it was still kind of hot. Er, so nothing the rest of fifth, and then sixth year was just a fucking joke… I think I got one blowjob and that was from Cormac during a very short reconciliation in the loos… er, I had a really bad Crush on Cedric then… I we did make out a little bit but he got fussy about him being fourteen and me being sixteen and that… and then seventh year begins,” Oliver sighed happily, “Perce tells me he hasn’t stopped thinking about me since before the summer, and here we are. I’ve technically only had sex once and I’ve got the best boyfriend in the world,” Oliver flushed a shade of light pink._ _

__The girls were in an absolute state; all dewy eyed and hands against their hearts at Oliver’s story._ _

__“Well I’m glad you’re so well acquainted with my brothers,” Ginny chuckled.  
“It’ll make the wedding that much easier,” Oliver winked at her, rousing a light laugh from the girls._ _

__“God, and Cedric’s with _Cormac_ now isn’t he? Bizarre,” Lavender sighed.  
“Yeah, they’ve only been together a couple months now… I think Cedric’s fine now he’s sixteen, cause Cormac’s only eighteen in like two months or something. Anyway, if you ask me they’re good together,” he smiled, genuinely happy._ _

__“Okay,” he exhaled deeply, turning to the card, “Let’s see the dare!”_ _

____“NO!”_ It huffed, _“You have failed to fully divulge your History. You must explain why each encounter took place!”__  
“Fine!” Oliver snapped back at it, “Third year twins was just because they caught me tugging one out and started teasing me and then I teased them and I suppose the “reason” was because we all knew we wanked and just wanted to have a bit of fun. Fourth year with McClaggen- we just found out each other were gay through chatting and just thought it would be a good idea to relieve the tension after practise… and matches… and, er, watching matches. And the Percy snogged me- I had no say in that. I’ve already explained why I had sex- and then the Weasley twins were just being incessant and charming as always which explains the later happenings of that year. Sixth- the blower from Cormac was just because he was miserable and we found ourselves in the loos together during lunch and it just happened- and the Cedric was just making out- didn’t even feel him up or anything – so not much to explain. And that’s that, CARD!”  
Oliver spat at the stupid, nosey, fluttering piece of purple card.  
“Now show us the dare!” 

___“This is a four star dare- anyone who has had sexual relations with any of your aforementioned partners must strip their upper half of clothing, along with yourself.”_  
“Ooh,” Oliver chuckled, “Own up ladies.”_ _

__The girls giggled among themselves. Oliver wasn’t expecting much: Katie was sixteen but in a long term relationship, Hermione was sixteen but a bit too clever for any of the people he’d been with- Lavender and Cho were still fifteen- Ginny fourteen- which just left Angelina, who was in seventh year with him.  
“Fine!” she sighed, “George Weasley and I may have gotten each other off after the Yule in fourth year,” she cringed, “Sorry Gin,” she added, patting the emotionally scarred Ginny’s knee affectionately._ _

__“Kit off, Johnson,” Oliver grinned, “Promise I won’t look,” he mocked, shooting her a wink as he unbuttoned his dark red shirt and slipped it over his head. Angelina removed her green camo pyjama top and vest, just leaving her in her bra._ _

__Just as they were about to roll the egg again, a series of thuds and crashes echoed from the entrance of the common room, and the Weasley twins staggered in, arm in arm, singing a very tuneless rendition of some nursery rhyme about pixies._ _

__“Whoa!” George exclaimed, taking in Angelina’s bareness, “What did we miss?”  
“We were just… packing up,” Hermione laughed, throwing a blanket at a very grateful Angelina, and de-charming the cards before tucking them back into their box, along with the egg._ _

___The twins were evidently very drunk, and as George staggered over to chat to Angie, Fred managed to walk right into a coat rack, knocking it clean over._  
“Argh!” he groaned, as he kneeled down in an attempt to get it upright, “Oi, Wood, give us a hand will you?”  
Katie sniggered, “I’m sure Oliver will be _happy_ to give you blokes a hand.” 


End file.
